THE VALUE OF SELF ESTEEM FOR GROWTH

Self esteem can be described as an person’s overall sense of his or her value or worth. It can be considered a sort of measure of how much a person “values, approves of, appreciates, prizes, or likes him or herself."

As per Morris Rosenberg, self-esteem is quite simply one’s attitude toward oneself (1965). He described it as a “favourable or unfavourable attitude toward the self”.

It involves a variety of beliefs about yourself, such as the appraisal of your own appearance, beliefs, emotions, and behaviors.

VARIOUS FACTORS THAT HAVE CONTRIBUTED TO SELF -ESTEEM INCLUDE:

1. Personality

2. Age

3. Life Experiences

4. Health

5. Thoughts

6. Social Circumstances

7. Reaction of others

Self-Esteem is a part of Self-Concept:

Self-esteem is not self-concept, although self-esteem is a part of self-concept. Self-concept is the perception that we have of ourselves, our answer when we ask ourselves the question “Who am I?” It is knowing about one’s own tendencies, thoughts, preferences and habits, hobbies, skills, and areas of weakness.

Self-esteem is a similar concept to self-worth but with a small (although important) difference: self-esteem is what we think, feel, and believe about ourselves, while self-worth is the more global recognition that we are valuable human beings worthy of love (Hibbert, 2013).

Difference between Self Esteem and Self Confidence

The terms self-confidence and self-esteem are often conflated. Confidence is a measure of faith in one’s own abilities; esteem is about our sense of self. It involves both thoughts and emotions and influences how we perceive others and interact with the world.

Although, one may possess one, it does not mean that they possess the other.

SELF COMPASSION IS NOT SELF ESTEEM

Finally, self-esteem is also not self-compassion. Being self-compassionate means we are kind and forgiving to ourselves, and that we avoid being harsh or overly critical of ourselves. Self-compassion can lead us to a healthy sense and understanding of self-esteem, but it is not equated and be part of self compassionate.

The terms differ widely and can be included when interpreted widely.

CHARACTERISTICS OF PEOPLE WITH HIGH SELF ESTEEM

1. They have more confidence in themselves and are able to build and are more confident that they will be able to excel in their respective fields.They strive to improve and avoid negative talks,

2. People with high self-esteem generally have clear ideas about what they want or need and are able to communicate those needs and wants to others. Feel worthy of love and approval. They approve of themselves and are not desperate for other people’s approval but they rely on their own judgment.They accept their responsibilities and make their own decision without blaming others.

3. It is common for people with high self-esteem to be good communicators. This includes having good listening skills which leave them open to taking advice, being open to change and new ideas.

4. They are adaptable to changes knowing that change is inevitable , they have more learning interests and take everyday as a challenge to learn new skill.

5. Enjoy Healthy relationships as they are able to communicate better people with high self-esteem generally enjoy good healthy relationships and are able to accept constructive criticism, without letting it dent their confidence. Because of their confidence they are rarely competitive with others because they are comfortable with their own abilities and accept others where they are at.

6. They are more goal oriented and focused and have more resilience

7. They are able to laugh at themselves and have a good sense of humor.

8. They have more optimistic attitude towards life and are open minded

9. They are able to take care of them physically , mentally and spiritually and are free from ailments.

Examples of Self Esteem

1. Act assertively without guilt

2. Don't spend too much on past,in fact live each moment and live without judgment.

3. You don't let others manipulate you, change your attitude as per circumstances

4. You recognize and accept variety of feelings, positive or negatives

5. You enjoy different activities like work, play

6. Build positive relationships, try to spend less time with life.

7. You accept challenges and take everything is needed to grow.

CHARACTERISTICS OF LOW SELF ESTEEM PEOPLE

1. Chronic indecision due to fear of making mistakes.

2. Want for perfectionism, which leads to constant frustration or underachievement when perceived perfection is not achieved.

3. Feelings of insignificance.

4. Negativity about life and inability to enjoy life.

5. Excessive will to please others

FACTS ABOUT SELF ESTEEM

It sometimes become difficult to wrap your mind around self-esteem and why it is so important. To help you out, we’ve gathered a list of some of the most significant and relevant findings about self-esteem and low self-esteem in particular

Let us discuss a few

1. Low self-esteem is linked to violence, school dropout rates, teenage pregnancy, suicide, and low academic achievement (Misetich & Delis-Abrams, 2003).

2. About 44% of girls and 15% of boys in high school are attempting to lose weight (Council on Alcoholism and Drug Abuse, n.d.).

3.Seven in 10 girls believe that they are not good enough or don’t measure up in some way (Dove Self-Esteem Fund, 2008).

4.Nearly all women (90%) want to change at least one aspect of their physical appearance (Confidence Coalition, n.d.).

5.The vast majority (81%) of 10-year old girls are afraid of being fat (Confidence Coalition, n.d.).

6. About one in four college-age women have an eating disorder (Confidence Coalition, n.d.).

7.Only 2% of women think they are beautiful (Confidence Coalition, n.d.).

8.Absent fathers, poverty, and a low-quality home environment have a negative impact on self-esteem (Orth, 2018)

RESEARCH ON SELF-ESTEEM:

Luckily , there are many astonishing results and studies that have been carried out to study the self esteem China, a collectivist culture, found that self-esteem was a significant predictor of life satisfaction (Chen, Cheung, Bond & Leung, 2006). They found that similar to other collectivist cultures, self-esteem also had an effect on resilience with teenagers. Teenagers with low self-esteem had a higher sense of hopelessness and had low resilience (Karatas, 2011).

In more individualistic cultures, teenagers who were taught to depend on their beliefs, behaviors, and felt open to expressing their opinion had more resilience and higher self-esteem (Dumont & Provost, 1999).

Elementary school programs that focus on improving self-esteem through short, classroom-based sessions also have a positive impact on students’ self-esteem, as well as reducing problem behaviors and strengthening connections between peers (Park & Park, 2014).

PRACTICAL STEPS TO BOOST SELF ESTEEM:

1. Set Practical Goals:

It’s important to set small, reachable goals that are within your power. For example, setting an extremely high expectation or an expectation that someone else will change their behavior is virtually guaranteed to make you feel like a failure, through no fault of your own

2.Stop being a perfectionist.

Acknowledge both your accomplishments and mistakes. Nobody is perfect, and trying to be will only lead to disappointment. Acknowledging your accomplishments and recognizing your mistakes is the way to keep a positive outlook while learning and growing from your mistakes.

3. Discover your life: Life is a journey where you will be subjected to trials and errors , but you have to discover yourself with zeal .

4. Adjust your self image:We all change as we age and grow, and we must keep up with our ever-changing selves if we want to set and achieve meaningful goals

5. Don't compare your life with others : The grass is always greener on the other side, stop blaming, stop criticizing , instead learn, grow and live the life you always wanted.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Tusharika Bhattacharya, a postgraduate in Law , a Certified Confidence Coach from ICF and has studied legal psychology as one of the special subjects , I am currently working as an In-house legal counsel at a U.S based M.N.C. My interest include meditation, yoga and mindfulness and doing research to implement mindfulness and well being in personal and professional relationships and at workplace.